Q: How do you make God laugh?

A: Make a plan.

An unfortunately not-so-funny joke from my friend Chris. But I'll try anyway. The game plan:

- Continue working my part time jobs (for the city and for the bookstore)
- Save as much money as possible
- Keep looking for "big girl" jobs, ideally one at a library or something internationally-related
- Move out of my parents' house A.S.A.P., for my own sanity, I don't care where to
- Perhaps eventually go back to school for a M.L.S. (Library Science), maybe on the East coast?

I feel like I would do well in a librarian or public service/consulate-type position. That's what enthuses me at this moment in time. Other than that, a place to live, a cell phone, and independence would be nice.

I'm gonna keep on truckin'. One day at a time. Hopefully someday sooner than later I'll look back on these days as a past hardship stepping stone to bigger and better things.

幸せ...

Things that make me happy, no matter where I am:

- books
- coffee shops
- getting lost in a good book while sitting in a coffee shop with a hot cup of something
- browsing for beauty products
- good friends

I'm back and I'm restless. I want so many things, but lack the money and focus to do them. I want independence, a routine, exciting and cultured diversions, financial stability. I want to be connected and disconnected at the same time. I want to enjoy being 25, young, and take advantage of all the possibilities life has to offer me. I want to know who my soul mate is. I want to feel at ease. I want to stop taking everything so seriously and just enjoy life. I want everyone who doesn't matter or who brings negative energy into my life to disappear without regret, attachments, or consequences. I want the comfortable, peaceful, fullfilling, fabulous life I envision but cannot seem to make for myself. I want to feel like I can do anything again.

For now, I will made do with, embrace, be grateful for the little pleasures in my life.